Laugh or You'll Cry!!
One Liners
Please submit any good
laughs to the Editor
Those considered to be in good taste and decency might get
published!!
Only in America ......do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to
get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
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Only in America .....do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries, and a diet coke.
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Only in America .....do banks leave both doors open and then
chain the pens to the counters.
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Only in America .....do we leave cars worth thousands of
dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the
garage .
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Only in America ...... do we buy hot dogs in packages of
ten and buns in packages of eight.
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Only in America .....do they have drive-up ATM machines
with Braille lettering.
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EVER WONDERED ...
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
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Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
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Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
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Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
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Why is it that doctors and lawyers call what they do
'practice'?
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Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and
dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
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Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
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Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush
hour?
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Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
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Why didn't Noah swat those two friggin mosquitoes?
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Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
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You know that indestructible black box that is used on
airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that
stuff?!
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Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
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Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck
together?
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If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
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If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the
terminal?
The Parish Council makes every effort to ensure that the content on this web site is fair, accurate and meets the standards of good taste and decency. The views expressed within are personal opinions of the contributors. The Parish Council is not responsible for any errors or false impressions they create, or for any errors in such contributions. Please email the Editor, or use the Comment option, if you find any of the published material is offensive.